singlemates.net
Knowing how to attract women is one of the most important pieces of wisdom that a man can have. It is tricky because different women look for different things in a man, and you cannot be sure of getting the woman that you want. Even men who are most successful with women may not always attract one particular woman. But they attract enough others that they can just shrug off anyone who is not interested, and look for the next.
If you go right up to a woman and ask her for a date with no introduction, it is likely that she will say no, and may even think you pushy and be scared. Although women are attracted to men by looks, scent, etc they need time to feel comfortable with a man before they will accept a date. There are some scary men in the world and most women will not take chances on someone they do not feel they know.
The good news is that you can get them to feel they know you with just a couple of minutes of conversation. During this time you need to be confident without being pushy. Be clear in your mind about who you are, and that you are not desperate for a date.
It is important to listen to what the woman wants to say, and to make her feel special. You can do this easily with a compliment that is particular to her. Before you approach her, take a moment to notice something special about her that you can compliment her on. Your compliment must be honest – something that you really like about her.
Your compliment should never be related to anything that women tend to be sensitive about, for example body size, weight or shape. Of course it should not be sexually related either, because that would make her feel uncomfortable at this stage.
For most women it is fine to compliment her on her eyes or her smile. If she is very pretty, she probably gets a lot of compliments like this and you need to be more original. Try complimenting her hands or her voice.
After that you can use what psychologists call ‘the constraint of choice’ to make sure that her only option is you. When a person is given only one option, they are more likely to take it. So for example, if you ask for her phone number, she has the choice of either giving it to you, or not. That’s two options and one of them is not your desired outcome.
Instead, give her the choice of either giving you her phone number or arranging a date now. Now she feels she has a choice, but she really only has one option – you. She is much more likely to give you her number this way.
As you become more used to doing this you will succeed with more women and that in itself will boost your confidence and get you more dates. That’s partly why older men tend to be more successful with women. Learning how to attract women is a skill that needs to be practiced.
Step 1:
So how do you know if you are suffering frienditis?
Does this sound familiar…?
You have lots of female friends but no girlfriend.
And you have no chance of starting something with your female friends, as you just don’t feel its right to make the first move. Sounds like you need my help to cure your frienditis!
Step 2:
Revealing your potential
Relationships can live or die by the first impression you make. If you give off a friendly first impression, it may ruin your chances of being seen as a potential partner.
The key to turning your luck around is to change the way you relate to women; and to approach first encounters with new people by being funny, confident yet enigmatic.
After all, being nice is fine to charm your grandma’s friends into giving you more tea and biscuits, but women of your age require a little bit more edge.
Get Flirting:Frienditis: How To Make Yourself Into Boyfriend Material
Step 3:
Beef up your body language
Whether converting a friendship to a relationship, or just approaching new relationships in a different way, you need to rethink your body language. As 93% of communication is non-verbal, a more masculine and sexy body language tells potential dates that you are a good man to be with.
A good start is to become a man’s man! Take up a martial art; like Krav Maga. Women love a man who can handle himself, and knowing how to disarm a knife wielding mugger, or yob with a baseball bat gives you that indefinable masculine confidence.
Also, giving off masculine body language is something you can learn. Push back your shoulders, lift your chest, stand with your feet wide apart, and make confident eye contact. Hook your thumbs in your front jean pockets, with your fingers out. This makes you look confident and shows off your assets. Women will notice the difference.
Step 4:
Think Dirty
What’s the difference between friends and boyfriends? Boyfriends think about having sex with their women! To be boyfriend material you need to think dirty.
Next time you are with someone you fancy, imagine slowly undressing her. Then, think in detail about exactly what you would like to do next.
What you are thinking is reflected in your body language – your sexual intent will start to become clear, catapulting you into the potential boyfriend zone.
Step 5:
Dating good friends of the opposite sex
Dating someone you know already as a friend is difficult, as you have been placed in that friendship box, and you run the risk of losing a good friend. If you really want to convert a friendship into a relationship, proceed with great care – it’s important to ascertain in the first case whether they fancy you. Do you actually have a flirtatious relationship, or is all the flirting one way?
Things to remember:-
Don’t risk a friendship if they are in a happy relationship, or don’t want a partner.
If you still want to declare your undying love, do it when your friend will be drinking more than you. If you are more sober than your friend then you can maintain your composure and find out the truth. Blaming a moment of indiscretion on alcohol won’t lose you any face.
If they clearly don’t respond to your advances, move on and try to achieve closure – there’s no point in lusting after a love affair that just isn’t going to happen.
Congratulations – you’ve learned new ways to avoid the “just good friends” trap and are ready to be a manly man in every situation!
First dates are tough situations. Often they can end up being painfully awkward. So what do you do?
Here is a list of dating tips to help you and your date get started on the right foot:
- Try not to meet at each other’s houses and try to drive yourself. This is so that if you want to end the date early, you won’t be trapped. This also helps avoid the impulse to invite your date in. Also, having your own car means you don’t have to worry about your safety; your date won’t know where you live and this avoids a date turning into some bad stalking nightmare.
- Try to keep the date as simple as possible. First dates can bring on jittery nerves. Jittery nerves and complicated plans do not mix. Just make it easy and enjoyable.
- Men, try ending the date first and do it politely, though make sure that you show you’re interested. This will make you stand out.
- Women, don’t wear anything provocative or too sexy. This sounds like an old cliché but first impressions last. Your date won’t know anything about you except for how you look and how you behave. He will take you at face value and giving him the wrong impression on what sort of person you are is not something you want to do.
- Try and wear clothing that makes you confident and that you are comfortable wearing. It will be uncomfortable enough without worrying about that tightness around your waist or the itchy necktie.
- Men, try to be specific about where you are going for the date. This will make the entire affair more comfortable and it prepares your date for what to expect and what to wear. Wearing a cocktail dress to a fast food joint is definitely out!
- Ask your date about himself/herself. A healthy interest in getting to know your date is a good sign to show. This means that you want to learn about and think of your date as an interesting person. Remember, the most interesting conversationalists are those who ask about others. Great topics are work, hobbies and sports. Just keep it light and conversational.
- Try not to overdo the perfume or the cologne. Too strong and the scent can be quite distracting. It’s very hard to complete an evening out if your date is dazed by the smell.
- Mouthwash is important. Also, brush your teeth and bring a couple of mints if you’re eating out.
- And always remember… have fun and be yourself!
People have taken to online dating like a duck takes to water…because it works…or, at least, it can work. Women are, in general, terrified of meeting a man that she has been chatting with online. All they have heard about are the scary things that can happen…and, I must say, they have a right to be careful to the extreme. That’s not only wise but vital. So what’s a nice guy to do? You aren’t a pervert, a sexual predator, or a weirdo. You are just a nice guy looking for “the” girl for you.
You must be patient. Don’t press her for personal information like her real name or where she lives. Keep your conversations light and fun until she feels comfortable talking with you online. Don’t try to rush her into meeting face-to-face. She will think you are desperate or a pervert. Patience. Patience. Patience.
Be absolutely honest about your physical appearance and job. A good relationship has never been, and will never be, built on lies and deceit. Eventually she will find out the truth anyway and there you are back at square one.
A picture really is worth a thousand words. Post many pictures of yourself doing your everyday activities and make them full body shots, not just head shots. If you were dating a girl in the real world she wouldn’t just see your head.
Once the discussion has been opened about meeting face-to-face for the first time, suggest that you meet in a very public place, during daylight hours and that she bring a friend with her. After all, you have nothing to hide. You’ve told her the truth about yourself and she has already seen a lot of pictures of you. The only thing left is to make her feel safe meeting you.
Be completely real. Women have a way of recognizing a phony guy. Therefore, it is important to always be yourself instead of trying to impress a woman by being something that you are not. Even if they fall for it in the beginning they will figure you out in time.
Keep her guessing. Women like a challenge as much as men. Therefore, it’s not necessary to work hard to show her just how much you like her. Let the relationship bloom over time and just enjoy the trip! Don’t be secretive or avoid her questions however, when she shows interest in your life by asking questions it is important to give her the answer.
If you say you’re going to call, call. This is a common mistake that many men make. If you tell a woman that you are going to call at seven p.m., they will be waiting for your call. Making them wait, or never calling, is rude and most women will become quickly uninterested in a man who doesn’t follow through
Be emotionally prepared. Many men forget that even the first date could be the start of a long term relationship if things go well. Prepare yourself mentally for the idea that the first, second or later date could be the night where you fall in love. Being unprepared can leave you less open to the woman that you are dating and give her the impression that you’re either not interested or just not ready.
Be a good listener. When your date is talking, she may be giving you clues about herself that could help you win your way into her heart. If you spend all of your time talking or simply pretending you are listening to her, then you are likely to miss out on something important. Also, keep eye contact when she is talking so that she can see that you are genuinely interested in what she has to say.
Look good for every date. Unless you have agreed in advance to dress casually, it is important to spend time to look good for dates. Every woman spends hours preparing for every day, so return the favor. While you may not spend hours getting ready, you should be particular about what you wear and whether you are properly groomed. A neat appearance reflects on you more than you might realize. It makes you appear more confident, organized and responsible.
A single compliment is often the best way to get the attention of a busy woman. For example, if you are grocery shopping and you see a woman you’d like to meet consider approaching her and giving her a very simple compliment to start up a conversation. After a few minutes, ask her for her phone number and tell her you’ll call later to continue the chat. Don’t forget to call when you say you will, otherwise she may get the wrong impression.
Be witty with your pickup lines. The first time you approach a woman; don’t try to impress her with intelligent conversation right from the start. Instead, you need to focus on being cute and clever so that you can get her phone number or at least give her yours. Cliché pickup lines may seem like the way to go, but you’d be better finding a genuine opener that she probably has not already heard a thousand times.