1. Pay particular attention to your personal safety. This means never giving out personal information such as your home address, phone number or your credit card details. Never agree to meet in a place that is secluded or poorly lit and always provide your own transport. It mans listening to your gut feeling about the other person and if something turns you off, do not agree to meet under any circumstances. Don’t be pressured by the other person. You have a right to say no and remain in control of the situation.

2. Many men who are interested in online dating, are not after permanent relationships. Some may even be married and not willing to divorce their wives. That is not to say all men are like that. It is possible to meet up with the love of your life through online dating and live happily ever after with him. Some people have done this. If your date seems hard to get onto, goes for some weeks without contacting you, only gives you a work or cell phone number or only calls at certain days or times, be suspicious. He could be married.

3. For some men, online dating means they forget what good manners are. Some people use anonymity as an excuse for saying – or rather, writing – things they would never do in real life. If you receive email that is not to your liking, either don’t reply or use the block feature in your email service, or on the dating site, if there is one provided. Never reply using your ‘reply’ button as this may reveal your personal email address to the other person. Instead, go the website, sign in and use the email address that was provided by the dating service.

4. You should be very specific in your profile about the type of person you want to meet. This will save both you and the others a lot of time and trouble. If you want to meet people of a certain age group, say so. If geographic location is important to you, describe that in your profile. What ever the specifics of your requirements are, it’s much better to go to the trouble of creating the profile that you want, than to have your inbox stuffed full of useless replies.

5. Once you have chosen a date, don’t spend all your time telling him how badly your ex treated you. He might begin to think there could be a reason for it. A new broom sweeps clean, so clean your slate and start afresh, even if you have had other bad experiences.

1. Do not lie

It is so tempting to tell a few small lies, especially online where nobody can see you and you may not get caught out. But remember you are not going to get anywhere if this relationship never makes it off your computer into real life. You are hoping to meet this guy pretty soon, and most of your lies will catch up with you.

Many people lie about their age, marital status, weight, height, job, and even what movies or foods they like, trying to make them seem more attractive to their ideal mate. The sad thing is that the more interested the guy is, and the more he likes you, the more disappointed and turned off he will be when he finds out you lied to him.

He may not care that you are a couple of years older than him or whatever, but he WILL care that you lied. He will feel betrayed and that he cannot trust you, and he will wonder what other lies you told.

So if there is a question you don’t want to answer, either ignore it or say you’ll tell him when you know him better. You do not have to reveal all your secrets but there is no need to lie.

2. Do not use an old photo

Do not have a photo that is ten years old on your profile. It may attract the guy to your profile in the first place, but he will be disappointed when he meets you and finds you looking more wrinkly than he expected. It is almost as bad as finding out you lied. He may not say anything but he will feel that he has been deceived.

Instead, try to find a recent picture that still makes you look good. This may mean having one taken professionally. Do not worry about the cost – it is worth it. Think of it as an investment in your future.

3. Do not tell all too soon

There is nothing worse than boring a guy with your whole life story the moment he gets in touch with you. Learn the art of telling just a little – enough to arouse interest but not enough to satisfy it, and certainly not so much that you send him to sleep. Always leave him wanting more!

A good rule of thumb here is to look at how much he wrote you and write back a little less. Answer any questions that he asked you, unless you do not want to for some reason, but answer them briefly. For example if he asks you what you do, just tell him. Do not give him your full resume or describe your whole day at work.

Most people like to talk at least as much as they like to listen. Concentrate on listening, being interested in him and asking him the same types of questions that he is asking you.

4. Do not be too eager

Generally, it is better not to contact guys first on an online dating site. Let them do most of the hunting and conquering. This will keep them interested. It also makes sure that you do not waste your time on guys who only answered your email to be polite.

If you see a guy’s profile that you really like and you decide to contact him first, simply write him one line asking him to take a look at your profile. Then leave it to him to do that and get in touch with you if he wants to.

When a guy does contact you, do not write back too fast. Wait at least 24 hours from the time that he sent the message. Then if he writes again after a week, leave it longer the next time. Show him that if he wants to hear from you quickly, he must not keep you waiting too long.

Do not be the one to suggest a face to face meeting first. This is very likely to scare him away. Guys are usually very keen to meet women they are interested in so that they can get things onto a real life, physical basis. So if he doesn’t suggest it, there will be a reason. He may be too busy right now, he may have lied about something, he may even be married. Forget it. Stay in touch casually by email if you want to, but keep looking for someone who does want to meet you so that you can move onto relationship dating for real.

Women are too critical and negative, no one wants to date a nag, so stop complaining about how much dating stinks and how many guys suck. Don’t try to change the guy and tell him how he should act or what he should do; it is ok to challenge a guy without criticizing him. Remember mist guys want to date a woman with a god attitude and an open mind.

Women talk too much, it is exhausting to go out with a woman who barely takes a breath between sentences. Stop going on and on about your job, you’re ex boyfriend, or how annoying one of your girlfriends is. A few guys want the play by play of what you did today. Remember slow down, and take a breath, ask him a few questions and listen.

Women are too high maintenance, I once knew a gal who thought that $1200 purses would attract more men to her. I don’t know how many guys are into these things and I actually think the average guy doesn’t know the difference between a Prada purse and the Chinatown special. I think guys who know you are dressed in designer everything may get scared off. Women if your hair is too perfectly quaffed and your wearing tons of makeup you make look like you just cant have fun, let loose, and be touched and that is certainly not the message you want to send to a guy you like.

Women are too insecure, dating can be nerve-racking, and I totally get that it wakes up some insecurities, but as much as you can remember to smile and make eye contact, you will already appear more comfortable. Don’t talk about how fat you feel and don’t talk about your faults or how many guys have dumped you it is just not that attractive.

And finally women come on too strong. Ever see the movie how to loose a guy in ten days? Watch it again; don’t talk about how cute your kids will be the wedding colors you love, and don’t start baking him cakes and buying him sweaters right away. Planning your next twenty years together is really not attractive at the beginning of dating a new person. Remember some mystery is good. The good news is we all make mistakes in dating and it helps to remember you are not alone. Just remember not to commit any of these dating mistakes and you will all ready be ahead in the dating game.

Remember even a bad date makes a great story so get out there and have always have fun, I am Andrea Syrtash and see you next time.

Because you are aware of the fact that the person you are chatting is reaching out to you in the same way as you are reaching out to that person, there is a tendency for an intimacy to build up even before you know it.
The medium ceases to be the deciding factor and when a person presses you for information which you have to supply immediately you might let certain details slip out unless you are well prepared.

You have to be on your guard all the time and keep constantly reminding your self that the person you are chatting with is, after all a stranger and a goodness-knows-what. The best thing that you could do is avoid instant intimacy altogether.

It doesn’t really matter if the other person finds you cold or reserved, you can easily solve that by telling the other person that it takes sometime for you to become comfortable with a person. That in fact is a good quality because it is as good as saying, “Well, I’m sorry I’m not the loose kind who plays around.”

There is something that many of my readers might want to know and that is how to find out if the other person is lying. As I had told you earlier, the Net can be a very unsafe place and so we have to be absolutely sure about the good faith of the other person before revealing any personal details about ourselves. So the next part has been devoted specifically for that.

4 Ways To Tell If Someone Is Lying

1.As discussed earlier, we are not going to resort to singles’ chat rooms dedicated specifically to online dating. Instead we will be in chat rooms of specific interest. So one very effective way of finding out if a person is lying would be to ask the person very pointed questions about the area of interest. If the person fumbles or gives vague answers then you do not have to waste your time on such a person.

2.Another thing that you could do is that from the moment you first make contact, jot down whatever details the person chooses to reveal to you and in subsequent encounters nonchalantly question the person about the details, if there is a contradiction in the two details then you can be as sure as pat that the person is lying.

3.Ask the person seemingly general questions but which in fact should have a very definite purpose, for example ask the person what he or she is looking for in such a relationship. Note down the answer. After two or three encounters again repeat the question and see whether the two answers match.

4.You could try pretending that you have chatted with the person before and innocently ask the person if he or she is such and such person (make something up) and try offering compliments to the person like, “I really enjoyed chatting with you the other day. You were perfectly charming…” and so on. If the person falls for cheap flattery like this, then obviously he or she makes it a hobby to chat with people under various identities.

And so the chatting goes on until the person really grows on you. When you feel that you can really trust the person, you may try giving the person your telephone number. Remember that this too is a giant leap towards building a relationship so it’s better that you be sure than sorry.

The safest thing you can do about telephone numbers is to mutually exchange it preferably at the same time, so that neither party is at a disadvantage. It’s really no big deal, you can afford to tell the person that you are just being wary, the person will understand. If he or she does not, then there is a good chance that he or she will not understand a lot of other things as well. In that case, dump the person.

It’s true that online dating, while in its infancy, was only made up of perverts, sexual predators, nerds and weirdoes but that is no longer true. It has become the main tool of the single person in every developed country in the world. Forty million people can’t all be wrong. Ask your girl friends if they have ever used online dating or are using it now. If they are honest with you, most of them have or are now members of at least one online dating site and maybe more than one. It really is the way to go to meet eligible men who want to meet you. It doesn’t matter what any of your numbers are…like age, height, weight or income either. Somewhere out there in the big wide world there is a man who will like you…..then love you….and think that you are beautiful and desirable. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” is true. What is considered beautiful in one part of the world is completely different from what is considered beautiful in another part of the world. It’s even different from one part of this country to another.

Find an online dating site that fits your needs. Write a great profile and post a flattering picture. Start contacting eligible men on the site. Mr. Close-enough-to-perfect could be a few mouse clicks away.

Here is a list of dating tips to help you and your date get started on the right foot:

- Try not to meet at each other’s houses and try to drive yourself. This is so that if you want to end the date early, you won’t be trapped. This also helps avoid the impulse to invite your date in. Also, having your own car means you don’t have to worry about your safety; your date won’t know where you live and this avoids a date turning into some bad stalking nightmare.

- Try to keep the date as simple as possible. First dates can bring on jittery nerves. Jittery nerves and complicated plans do not mix. Just make it easy and enjoyable.

- Men, try ending the date first and do it politely, though make sure that you show you’re interested. This will make you stand out.

- Women, don’t wear anything provocative or too sexy. This sounds like an old cliché but first impressions last. Your date won’t know anything about you except for how you look and how you behave. He will take you at face value and giving him the wrong impression on what sort of person you are is not something you want to do.

- Try and wear clothing that makes you confident and that you are comfortable wearing. It will be uncomfortable enough without worrying about that tightness around your waist or the itchy necktie.

- Men, try to be specific about where you are going for the date. This will make the entire affair more comfortable and it prepares your date for what to expect and what to wear. Wearing a cocktail dress to a fast food joint is definitely out!

- Ask your date about himself/herself. A healthy interest in getting to know your date is a good sign to show. This means that you want to learn about and think of your date as an interesting person. Remember, the most interesting conversationalists are those who ask about others. Great topics are work, hobbies and sports. Just keep it light and conversational.

- Try not to overdo the perfume or the cologne. Too strong and the scent can be quite distracting. It’s very hard to complete an evening out if your date is dazed by the smell.

- Mouthwash is important. Also, brush your teeth and bring a couple of mints if you’re eating out.

- And always remember… have fun and be yourself!

You wouldn’t give your name, address and phone number to a strange man that you met in a bar or on the street so you should never do that online either. Play it safe. Get to know this man who could turn out to be Prince Charming before you give out any information that could make it possible for him or others to trace you. Don’t tell a stranger exactly where you work. Say that you are a legal secretary (if that’s what you are) for a mid-sized law firm….not that you work for Brown, Smith and Jones Attorneys-at-law. It is safe to tell him what city you live in but you should wait to be any more specific than that until you have been chatting and exchanging emails for awhile.

Use only the tools provided by the dating service you belong to. Most offer chat and private email on their site. Do not give out your isp email address. If you must give out an email address make it a free one such as Hotmail or Yahoo. Your isp address is traceable for anyone who wants to go to the trouble.

When the time comes for you to have your first face-to-face, make that first meeting in a public place and during day light hours. Take a friend with you or arrange for one to call you on your cell soon after the arranged meeting.

Remember…you ARE in control so do not let anyone pressure you into revealing more personal information than you are comfortable with revealing.

There are many reasons for the phenomenal growth of online dating sites and the number of people, men and women of all ages, races and religions who use them as their primary source for meeting people and looking for “the one”.

If you don’t believe me, just ask your friends in the “real” world. If they are honest, most of them will tell you they have or are using an online dating service.

Here are three good reasons why thousands of people sign up for dating services everyday:

(1)    You can be anonymous. You will never be required to give your real name, address, email address, phone number or place of employment to another online user. You, of course, may do so but only at your own discretion and only when you feel completely safe. You are not required to post a picture of yourself. Posting a picture, however, will get more responses to your profile. So you can surf through the other members on the dating site you have joined with complete anonymity.

(2)    You have so many more choices online that you do in your brick and mortar world. Before the world of online dating came of age, the choice of friends and even of lifetime partners was limited to those we came in contact with through college or work. No more…the world is your oyster. You can go through hundreds…even thousands of profiles to find the right man for you.

(3)    The “safety factor” is the biggest reason of all. An online dating service will never reveal your personal information. You get to choose who has that information and when they have it.

Time: You can go through hundreds of online profiles and look at hundreds of pictures in the same length of time only one real world date takes and the screening is already done for you. You can tell right away if a guy is only looking for casual relationships or long term commitments. How many times have you worked 8 hours, gone home and spent another hour getting ready to go out then gone to the local hang-out for singles only to see the same old jerks, losers and drunks that are always there?

Money: For the price of one evening out on the town you can enjoy an entire month of meeting men from the safety of your own home….do it in your jammies or sweats and with a beauty facial working its magic.

It works. It really does work if you are willing to do the right things. Write a profile that grabs attention, post recent pictures of yourself, be fun and interesting while chatting with the men you meet on line, answering emails promptly and being on time for a pre-arranged online meeting.