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When you join a dating site it is usually to find a romantic date, so how do you go about choosing your online dating identity? First of all, you will have filled in the numerous questions used to find your perfect match. Of course most matches are not truly perfect and you will have to use your own common sense in choosing those that seem to be the best fit with what you desire in a date. If the person loves football and you hate it, there’s not much point getting together unless you know you can live with that.
First you will receive an email from them to show you that they are interested. Of course, your real email address will be hidden, so don’t just hit the ‘reply’ button or you will risk revealing it. You need to log in to the dating website and then go to your prospective date’s profile. Read everything they have written about themselves and see if it is a fit with what you would like in a date.
You might be able to tell what sort of person they are from the wording of their first email to you. If they have written something like, Hey Babe, let’s hit the beaches tomorrow, When you specifically asked to be addressed by the name you’ve chosen for your profile, then you can be reasonably sure that this is not the person you are looking for. It may seem like a little thing at first glance, but if someone can’t respect your wishes in a small thing, will they be likely to respect them in a more important issue?
Other things to watch out for in their emails are things like do they seem to avoid answering your questions, do they seem to anger easily, and are they controlling? Watch for respect. If a person sounds respectful it is a good sign. Some people tend to forget that a real person with real feelings is on the other end of their email.
Once you decide not to use the anonymous email address provided by the dating service, choose a free email account (eg hotmail) and never reveal your full name. The same applies to telephone calls. Use a cell phone or an anonymous telephone service for phone calls until you get to know the person better.
Once you decide to meet in person, take note of whether they look like their photo. If they have told you that their photo is a recent one, but you can see it’s not, then you know they have lied to you. Once again, if they can tell a white lie, then they can tell a whopper, so be careful. Once you put a few safeguards into place, go ahead and have some fun. You’ll enjoy it all the more knowing you are safe.
When you are hoping to attract and seduce a woman, you will need to know how to win her trust. Women are taught to be cautious of men throughout their lives. Children are told by their parents and teachers to be careful of strange men and for girls this continues after they are grown up.
So when you want to attract a woman, you need to earn her trust. This means treating her in a way that shows you will not hurt her. This is not just a question of hurting her physically, although this is certainly a factor. However, she also wants to know that you will not hurt her and treat her badly emotionally.
A man who is impatient and tries to bully women or coerce them into agreeing to a date is not likely to be successful with women. There may be a few who will accept this kind of treatment but most will run away. If you push a woman too hard for her phone number, for example, she will become afraid and will give you a false one.
A great way to win a woman’s trust is to establish a connection. In fact, this works for all relationships and you are probably aware of it. For example, if you are stuck in an elevator or involved in a dangerous or awkward situation with other people, you will quickly trust the people who are in that situation with you. A connection is created and a level of trust which would normally have taken months to build up, is right there immediately.
Of course you cannot arrange to get stuck in an elevator with every attractive woman that you meet – or if you do, you will find that word gets around town and people quickly become unwilling to enter elevators with you! But a great technique when you first meet a woman and want to quickly win her trust, is to create some kind of connection like this. Pick out something that unites the two of you and sets you apart from others.
It will help if you practice doing this with almost anyone you see at parties or in nightclubs. Even if you are not attracted to the person and don’t intend to talk to them, look for something that could form a connection between you and imagine what you would say. It will soon become second nature to you.
The important point with this technique is to talk about your own feelings, not hers. It works best if it’s some kind of problem that you both have – you’re dressed too smart, you wish you could smoke, etc. Does it look like her shoes might be uncomfortable? Don’t mention her shoes, but create a connection by saying you wished you’d worn your new shoes a couple times before you wore them tonight.
You can win her trust in seconds by creating a bond like this. Then you can reinforce it with touch. A touch on the arm or upper back, or holding her hand for a moment, is ideal. This will reassure her that you are interested and will take care of her. Keep it brief to leave her wanting more.